Friday, May 8, 2009

Wants To Be Love?

Everyone wants to be in love!

When I ask people what they really want in a loved one, some of them can describe the person, some cannot. Some believe their right person exists, some do not. Some are looking to fill a void in their life, some are looking to make an addition.

But, when it comes down to it. everyone wants to be in love. Love seems to be the answer to all kinds of questions, the solution to all kinds of problems. Fine! Fine! But how to get that right person, the one to be in love with, is the secret.

After a bit of study, lots of observation and a good deal of experience it seems to me that a person has to know for sure what they want, rather than who they want. They need to know the qualities they want in another. To me high on that list is goodness. It is a great quality to insist upon in a loved one. I don't know how many people think of this, but it is extremely important. It covers a whole group of things like kindness, truthfulness, politeness, graciousness, unselfishness, generosity, and wholesomeness. To be good is more than following the rules. It is a sincere and essential quality of the heart. It lasts.

Not everyone is in love, as we think of it. That is, in love with another. But it is possible to be in love with the idea of being in love and stay there until that loved one shows up. Surely he or she will.

In today's world, we have a myriad of options: online dating, speed dating, blind dates, bars, parties, friends, church groups, supermarkets, libraries, and on and on. Yet, with all of these options (and many, many more), so many of us are still looking for that true love.

Monday, April 27, 2009

An Innovative Twist to a Wedding Venue: Balloons


A very interesting and innovative idea to decorate a wedding venue could be to add balloons to the list. A huge balloon arch with white and gold or maroon balloons woven together sounds and looks different and yet marks the event with style. The balloons could be colour coordinated to match with the rest of the theme. Balloons can be used very effectively to set the tone of your party.

Suppose you have the island wedding theme in mind, then bunches of blue, green and yellow balloons all around the venue would add a sense of cheer and island casual. A colour tone of cream/gold and maroon would lend a note of sobriety and formality to the event. Wedding Balloons floating around on the ground would add a fairytale touch to the whole occasion. You could even use Wedding balloons to arrive in style - arrive at your wedding venue in a hot air balloon! That's really doing things differently. Balloons may be used in an arch at the entrance or red balloons can edge the red carpet accentuating the theme.

Some decorators even use balloons as stand alone arrangements just like flowers around the venue of the wedding. Party planners and decorators use colour themes to great advantage to beautify and enhance this special day. Some couples use balloon decorations as wedding flavours - each guest may receive a pretty set of balloons tied in a creative fashion to take home. A small poem or some thoughts may be written down and tied to the balloons as a lasting memento to the occasion.

Balloons are a unique way to add pizzazz to a party or wedding reception.

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Pursuit Of Happiness In A Marriage


by: John Khu
Happiness is a precious gift. The pursuit of happiness should direct one to look within oneself and to the love that surrounds us. Happiness means well-being, sound health, and calm mind. Man is a social being and in spite of the nuclear society we live in today, all our relationships make us what we are. And one of the most important of them all is the institution of marriage. Marriage means commitment, love and understanding. More often than not the pursuit happiness ends in marriage.

Marriage is a firm bonding based on love, passion and sexual desire. Each equally important in its own sphere as we know that life should have a complete balance of love and commitment. Marriage is an ultimate commitment of life to peruse the natural way to attain happiness.

Pursuit of happiness through a marriage however is an individualistic view. While even half a century earlier marriage was the ultimate goal, the contemporary world has seen a drastic change in the way relationships are viewed. While marriage is still a revered institution it is no longer a respectability and recognition mandate, especially for women. Both genders today are equally ambitious and successful which makes the pursuit for happiness all the more definitive.

A happy and successful marriage today entails partners who deserve each other. They are a perfect match intellectually, physically and emotionally. Pursuit of happiness in marriage also includes the achievement of material comforts that ease the way for two people to share a lifetime together.

Pursuit of happiness in a marriage depends on making the right choices. Since ancient times marriage has been a source to attain real happiness and fulfillment in life. Marriage brings a sense of completeness in both men and women. This philosophy is reflected in all religions and isms that teach us to look deeper within ourselves. Marriage is the most natural institution formed by man. Evolution has made humans realize their gender differences and compatibility. Marriage has given them a formal bonding and an atmosphere to raise their children.

The pursuit of happiness through marriage is therefore a phenomenon that has come down through generations. It is a time-tested and proven theory which holds true even today because it is result of not human actions but human belief. It is an intrinsic aspect of human practicality. That is why, while many customs have come and gone with civilizations, marriage has lasted over centuries. Man’s pursuit of happiness is incomplete without the sanctity and bliss of a wedded life.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Wife Cheated: Has Your Wife Cheated On You?


by: Calle Zorro
Overcoming the insecurity that comes from having a wife who’s been unfaithful can be the most difficult form of insecurity to over come. For this reason, I want to give special attention to this emotionally-charged and sensitive subject.

If your wife has ever cheated on you, she shouldn’t have. And honestly, unless you previously cheated on her, there is no good excuse for her infidelity.

Now, I’ll say right up front that this is such a personal matter with so many variables that only you can decide how and what is the best way to deal with your wife’s infidelity. A person can decide that the marriage has been irreparably damaged and get a divorce. Or, a person can acknowledge their partner made a foolish mistake and forgive her for it and move on.

Either way, that’s a personal choice you’ll have to make for yourself. It’s such a personal thing that I’m not sure I can really help you. But, I would like for you to consider some suggestions…

Here’s the first thing I’ll suggest to you: REFUSE TO LET ANY ACTION OF YOUR WIFE’S EAT AT YOU UNTIL IT DESTROYS YOU!

Don’t allow yourself to develop the victim-mentality where you’re constantly reliving and remembering what she’s done. Don’t persist in blaming, condemning, and judging her. It will only serve to poison you with bitterness, resentment, and hatred.

It’s one thing if a woman’s actions destroy a marriage. It’s another thing to LET a woman’s actions destroy a man.

Unfortunately, this is exactly what many men let happen. After they’ve “reconciled” with their wife over her infidelity, they then let it eat on them until HIS MINDSET becomes so poisoned that it destroys both the marriage and himself.

Here’s something else I’ll suggest to you: let her off the hook – your hook. In doing so, you put her on God’s hook – and then it’s up to Him to deal with her as He knows is right and just. You see, a cheating wife has only scarred herself. It’s not on you, it’s on her. God will see to it that she reaps for the evil she’s done.

The Bible tells us, “Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord, I will repay.” Because this is true, you don’t have to worry about what she’s done anymore. You can just let it go, let her off the hook, and let God take care of it in the RIGHT way.

Here’s the next thing I’ll ask you to consider: in truth, both married men AND women cheat on their spouse to varying degrees. Usually and mostly, the cheating only takes place inside the mind. But sometimes, one or both partners make the mistake of taking it to a level that’s outside of their mind.

For women, her “cheating” involves fantasies portrayed to her in soap operas or Harlequin Romances, or in her own fantasies created out of her imagination or experiences she encounters in life.

For men… Well, you already know that most men find pleasure in imagining having sex with any and every attractive woman they encounter. You already know they’re intensely turned on by the thought of having sex with a woman for the very first time, by scoring a one-night stand with a perfect stranger. You already know that it’s not unusual for men to fantasize about having wanton sex with dozens of hot women.

What’s bizarre though is that these same men would have a huge panic / anxiety / insecurity attack if they found out their wife was having the same sort of imaginations that they themselves were having.

Now, how crazy is that?

Wouldn’t it really be better to keep the fidelity of the marriage intact by recognizing that whether male or female, our sexuality is a key part of us and just be open and honest about it?

Wouldn’t it be better to use these sexual thoughts – both yours and hers – to pull you closer together?

Wouldn’t it be better for both of you to share your most secret, intimate thoughts on a bed of trust, respect, appreciation, and privacy that builds sexual excitement between you and your wife – so that neither one of you ever have to go outside of the marriage to enjoy what’s already going on in both your head and hers?

Monday, February 9, 2009

The Truth of Divorce


The Truth of Divorce
by: James Walsh


Baseless Myths

Women Suffer More Emotionally than Men: Since ancient times, women have been described as being emotionally sensitive. Sociologists argue that this reason attributed to the subordination of women in ancient society. Women were supposed to be immature and ill-equipped to handle responsibilities. This feature was prominent in patriarchal societies.

The woman was touted as being weak cognitively, emotionally and physically. She was always supposed to be protected by the male. In the beginning, it was her father, then her husband and in later years her son. She could not live and shoulder duties herself. But this view is baseless. Modern sociologists shatter this myth. They argue that both the genders have equal proportions of emotionality.

Women are not the weaker gender in an emotional capacity. In fact, they are resilient. They have the emotional reserves to withstand betrayal and shock. Men are not as resilient as women. They also tend to suffer an emotional setback. They find it harder to accept that the spouse has left them.

Sociologists state that men have to nurture and build their emotional strength. Women are born with this emotional strength. Studies show that men and women suffer mentally and emotionally from divorce. Their behavioural methods of reaction may be different.

Men may become more withdrawn. They tend to become loners undergoing traumatic phases of depression. Women, in contrast, tend to reach out. Emotional battering makes them extrovert in nature. They tend to develop and widen their social circle. They draw their emotional strength from this support group.

Both genders are likely to fall prey to alcohol and substance abuse. A major difference is that women are able to accept their deep emotional scarring. They usually seek professional intervention. Men do not. Men live in denial. They pretend that the divorce has had no effect on them.

Family forces men into therapy usually. Marriage counsellors state that an average of 54% of women and men divorcers suffer from the same emotional setbacks. There is no concrete evidence to prove this myth true.

Ex-spouses are Always Hostile towards Each Other: Social psychologists argue that divorce cannot be pleasant. Usually, 89% of divorces are settled at an acrimonious level. The ex-spouses begin post-divorce life wrought with bitterness. They cannot stand each other. They tend to harm each other in a direct or indirect manner.

Sociologists insist that the type of divorce determines the level of hostility. Hostility does not exist in cases of uncontested divorces. Here, both spouses want the divorce and agree mutually to every marital issue. The divorce is uncontested and amicable.

On the other hand, contested divorces are bitter. The respondent is drawn into the divorce. Usually, contested divorces involve a bitter and hostile trial hearing. The Family Solicitors of London state that this happens as spouses disagree on the level of importance accorded to the marriage. But this acrimony is short-lived.

It usually lasts for a period of eight months to a year. It is situation and location-specific. The presence of children forces ex-spouses to maintain cordial relations with each other. But the image of ex-spouses flying at each other's throats does not hold up. Ex-spouses just cannot stand each other. They are not bosom buddies.

Usually, exes become calm and serene when their own life post-divorce settles down. They tend to become forgiving when they have a good job, a new comfortable residence and a secure future. They are altruistic and do not hate the ex. They simply do not acknowledge his or her existence if not forced to.

This does not mean that they are hostile towards one another. They do not accord any importance to their ex in their life. The ex-spouse is just another acquaintance who has no influence on them.

Men Tend to Remarry More than Women: This myth is untrue. It exists only in general perception. Studies reveal that 19% of both men and women divorcers tend to remarry. The duration after which they remarry differs. Men tend to jump back into the dating arena soon after divorce. A longitudinal study to this effect shows that men tend to engage in physical encounters frequently post-divorce. Men tend to marry women similar in nature to their ex-spouse. They unconsciously seek younger versions of exes.

They tend to remarry after six months of divorce. In comparison, women divorcers are cautious. They also remarry. They tend to go back to dating after a year. They end up marrying socially and financially mature men after two years of divorce. They are content to date and wait. They are not eager to get married again soon after the divorce.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Ideas on How to Find Unique Wedding Favors


Wedding favors are the first things that come to mind when you are planning for your wedding day. The most common things that would come to mind are CDs, bells and figurines. However, you just want to have a unique keepsake which will represent your personality on your wedding ceremony. Could you really find ways to have your own wedding souvenir which others never had before?
Well, the answer to the question is yes. Personalized gifts could always be unique in the sense that you just have to inject your thoughts and style into it. Amazingly, you and your soon-to-be lifetime partner could do the shopping.
Always bear in mind that making your wedding favors unique should always be an idea that would come from you and your partner. Since you want your personalities reflected on it, personalizing it should start from your own initiative. Here are several things you could do:
1. Sit down with your partner and talk about it. You shall be one in the next few weeks or months. Choosing gifts for your guests could be one good bonding moment for the two of you. Discuss your thoughts and see how your own personality could be injected into the favor. As you are two different individuals, blending would be necessary.
2. Go shopping around. Even if you want your wedding ceremony souvenirs your own, you are not prohibited from getting ideas through window shopping. There are different shopping stalls whose main purpose is to provide you gift ideas. You could always get expert advice for your own guests' keepsake.
3. Online shopping. Hundreds if not thousands of wedding ideas flung on the web. You will surely find a store that could serve the objective of giving you unique wedding favors. You will definitely be amazed with the many selections you have. There are measuring spoons and even tissue boxes. Adding a personal touch could always be done. Post your queries to the online store before coming up with the final decision.
4. Match your gifts with your wedding reception. You could always regard your venue for the wedding in choosing your wedding souvenirs. A lot of specialty shops offer favors for beach and garden weddings. They could also offer you a list which is suited for the particular season or climate. These will definitely be distinctive options for you.
Making your own wedding favors will not only be exceptional for your celebration. It could also make you save on cost. However, if you do not have the luxury of time to do all the work, you could seek help from peers and relatives and even your wedding planner. Just be sure that your ideas will be reflected on the gifts to make the whole event more meaningful and colorful.
Regina Watson is the owner of Elegant Wedding Impressions. She sells a variety of wedding favors at affordable prices. Elegant Wedding Favors carries cheap wedding favors and unique wedding favors. At Elegant Wedding Impressions you will be able to find a variety of quality wedding accessories such as guest books, Unity Candles, toasting flutes, wedding decorations, ring pillows, bridesmaid gifts and groomsmen gifts.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Regina_Watson

Friday, January 2, 2009

The Best Tips About Flirting On A Date


The main thing to remember with flirting is that it is fun and so much more so when you are receptive to it and understand when it is happening to you. The best flirtatious moments will always take you by surprise.

You are a guy who knows how to date, you are a guy who hasn't dated in years, you are a guy who has never been successful with women. Whatever your situation there are some common dating rules to follow when venturing into the dating jungle.

1. Look your best. Get some decent clothes and shoes. Get clothes that fit you, suit you and are contemporary. Don't just buy one outfit, sort out your entire wardrobe. If you can't take care of yourself, how are you going to take care of her? Oh yes and buy a good well tailored suit, there is no excuse not to.

2. Get your hygiene and styling sorted out. Down to the barbers and sort out your hair, get a decent style if possible. If you don't have much hair still get down to the salon and either get your head shaved or something you can handle. Then it is off to the shops with you for good quality cologne and a grooming kit. Yes that means some expense. Men are so often criticized for smelling bad. Get into a regular showering routine and smell good always. Women appreciate it!

3. Sort out your job if you have one. Women want a man who has some ambition in life so coasting along as a skateboard instructor is generally not going to win you a real catch (by the way I love skateboarding!). Any job is better than none, but knuckle down and sort out some direction in your life. Change job if need be but at least try and look like you you have something of a career. If you have a manual job, at least have some plans to work for yourself. If you already do, then you are on the right track but know what you are about work wise and have some idea of your future because they will be asking questions about your prospects even if they pretend it isn't important. It is!

4. Get your knowledge levels up. Make sure you are up to date with current affairs, watch the news and read quality papers. Women do not appreciate stupidity and laziness is no excuse either. Current affairs are important in showing you know all about the world outside. If you travel a lot then this will help tremendously, if you don't have plans to travel, get some. Being able and willing to sort out vacations is essential in the grand scheme of things.

5. Do not extol the virtues of drinking in the bar 5 nights a week. This will never win any fair princess's heart. If you love your booze sort yourself out as there are other things in life too. Taking your lady for a drink is fine, but give them the impression that you live in there will get you absolutely nowhere - fast.

6. If you love your sport then fine. If sport is a religion you may have a problem but everything by degrees guys. If you are serious about dating then ramming the subject of soccer, ball games or football down your date's throat will put them off in record time. Sport to the uninitiated is completely boring and shows not only sheep mentality to a woman but lack of thought, creativity or inspiration. Millions of girls love sport too and that is fine but don't make your passion into a one-sided one.

9. Never expect sex on a first date. If all you are after is sex you have come to the wrong place for reading material. If you are looking for the girl of your dreams there is nothing more sexy than a patient man. You are easily capable of waiting for the right woman so do it instead of thinking with your balls.

10. Sort out your educational knowledge of manners, courtesy and chivalry. A woman likes being treated well, particularly with respect. Lose the coarse language, the swear words, the rudeness and the laziness. Know how to eat in a top restaurant, know about fashion and jewelry and in particular flowers. Know how to hold a door open for a woman, let her go first and help her with her seat. Listen to what she says but have opinions of your own too. Show her respect and manners at every step and you should not go wrong.

11. Start listening and stop talking. Keep your date interested but don't turn into a one man entertainer. She will bore of you quickly because she wants to talk about herself too. Listen to things she tells you about her and remember them. Women love to chat so you need to learn to listen to her. Remembering things she told you will impress her by the bucketful. Fact.

12. Give up smoking now!

13. Lean to dance even if you have two left flat feet. Women love to dance and dancing is a physical contact sport (or can be). It is also romantic and sexy. You can be the world's worst dancer, I don't care. But if you stay seated when she is on that dance floor you may as well not exist. If you can join Salsa and dancing classes all the better. You don't need to be Travolta but you should have an idea of the basics of rhythm. Get started today!

You are at a party and out of nowhere someone is standing close to you. Like a genie, they keep turning up, close by, catching your gaze. You go and chat and they stand in the same position as you, playing with their hair, laughing with you and holding your gaze. This person likes you and is flirting. How do you know? Because without realizing it, you are an expert in flirting and body language.

What would dating be without flirting. Flirting is fabulous, flirting is fun, flirting is giving out signals that we may be interested in someone, or we may be pretending. But within reason, flirting is part and parcel of our daily lives. Flirting can be harmful when it threatens fidelity but it can also be sexy and bring people closer together. Some people are good at flirting and some people hopeless.

Are you a flirt? If you are you know it and are secretly proud of the fact. It is sexy when you flirt and people like it. Flirting means giving people attention, it means, smiling, touching, whispering. In the right circumstances it is a powerful tool especially against the unwary. In the wrong circumstances it will get you fired. There is a gulf between flirting and unwanted sexual advances so beware.

It is useful to look at some of the key indicators of flirting and they can prove extremely useful when working out if the person across the table from you is interested. The one to keep your eye on the most is "mirroring". Mirroring is when someone copies your body movements whilst retaining eye contact. Its is one of the biggest giveaways there is.

Eye Contact

• Pupils are dilated and eye contact is maintained
• Eye contact combined with an arched eye brow
• Any form of winking
• Rapid eye movement and blinking
• Eye contact where the gaze is held longer than usual. Men normally look away.
Hair and Mouth

• Playing with hair in a stroking or toying motion
• Eye contact whilst playing with hair
• Touching your hair at any time
• Lots of smiling, open mouthed and teeth flashing
• Lip licking
• Puckering lips in a simulated kiss form
• Any form of touch of the lips or teeth with tongue

Body Movement

• The thrusting of chest or breasts outwards whilst holding your gaze
• The copying of your posture - mirroring
• Holding your gaze whilst moving to music
• Using a posture with legs crossed towards you
• Leaning in towards you whilst holding your gaze
• Open legged posture facing you
• The display of flesh of arm or thigh

Touching

• They will want to touch you and will reach out to do so with some excuse
• They will offer to place food in your mouth as if feeding you
• They will play with their hands and then with yours

The Way they Speak

• Their tone and speed of conversation mirrors your own
• Lots of laughter and questioning tones
• In a group, you are singled out by this person for attention even in general conversation and questions. This happened to me in New York and I was taken aback how obvious it was.

The main thing to remember with flirting is that it is fun and so much more so when you are receptive to it and understand when it is happening to you. The best flirtatious moments will always take you by surprise.

by: enache vladian